<\/a>My plane landed in Bangkok, Thailand and I needed a shower. BAD. It didn’t help that the minute you get off the plane you are completely covered in sweat, and you stay that way until the minute you leave for home. It is HOT in Bangkok. Ball stuck to the leg hot. My dear friend, John Wilson, was waiting for me at the airport. He found us a taxicab where the driver not only didn’t mind us lighting up a joint in the back seat, but was happy to take the occasional hit now and then (completely ignoring the traffic signals as he zipped down the road stoned). He was going well over the speed limit and did not seem to give a half a damn about stop signs.<\/p>\nWhen we got to our “motel” (i use this word loosely) I noticed a sign on our doors warning us of the she-male hooker that seems to be robbing all of the motel customers. Nice place. Pffft. But for 8 US dollars a night and virtually every other motel on Koh San Road sold out, it looked like this is where we would stay.<\/p>\n
The first bit of bad news was that the “shower” in my room was nothing more than a hose like you use to wash dishes attached to the toilet. No hot water. The second bit of bad news was that I had to share my room with roaches so big that one of them rolled up a newspaper and started swatting ME.<\/p>\n
I was so tired from flying from Columbus, Ohio to Chicago, from Chicago to Tokyo, and from Tokyo to Bangkok that I THOUGHT I would just want to sleep. But for reasons know only to the Gods of racked nerves, too much pot, a slight case of dysentery, and insomnia, I was suddenly energized! I was ready for a night in BANGKOK! I was ready for ADVENTURE! I was ready to GET THE HELL out of this disgusting motel room.<\/p>\n
John and I went downstairs and explored the legendary Koh San Road. We found a nice bar full of Europeans and sat and enjoyed a couple of local beers. That’s when he gave me even more bad news.<\/p>\n
“Dude, we like\u2026 have to leave town first thing in the morning.” He said.<\/p>\n
“I just got here, man. F*** off.” I replied.<\/p>\n
“Well, there is like a civil war they expect to break out and we might be safer somewhere else.”<\/p>\n
“A CIVIL WAR?? WHAT?”<\/p>\n
“Well, there is a group called the yellow shirts, and they are at war with this group called the red shirts, and\u2026”<\/p>\n
“Wait.” I interrupted. ” I am WEARING a red shirt. Holy s***.”<\/p>\n
” Don’t worry, I’ve got us two tickets on the first bus out tomorrow. We will go to Cambodia for safety”<\/p>\n
I am pretty sure that in the history of the planet there have been billions upon billions of different phrases spewed from different mouths all over the world in hundred–if not thousands–of languages. But John Wilson was the first to say the phrase “We’ll go to Cambodia\u2026 for SAFETY.”<\/p>\n
Cambodia is the home to many of the deadliest snakes and insects on the entire planet. It is also the home of the worst possible healthcare imaginable, so if you DO get biten by something deadly, kiss your ass good bye. It is also where lowlifes,\u00a0paedophiles, and murderers who are hiding from the authorities from the country in which they committed their horrifying crimes. I was in for one HELL of a ride. I was SURE to find trouble in Cambodia. Especially hanging out with crazy John Wilson (who once tried to fight an entire Australian Rugby team because he “doesn’t take s*** from anybody.”)<\/p>\n
And we DID have and amazing adventure in Cambodia, but THAT is another story. Stay tuned.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Today, we’ve got a very special Guest Post from Jake Iannarino, Comedian, Actor and avid Traveler. Here he talks candidly […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":3498,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[152],"tags":[9,67,136],"class_list":["post-3493","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-travel-talk","tag-guest-posts","tag-international-cell-phone","tag-world-phone"],"yoast_head":"\n
Travel Adventures With Jake Iannarino - Mobal<\/title>\n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n\t \n\t \n\t \n \n \n\t \n\t \n\t \n